Paul Heaton
Meanwhile
[Verse 1]
Jack confides in Catherine that he's filing for divorce
Catherine gives her promise to keep it secret, 'But, of course!'
As soon as backs are turned in soaps, they're sharpening their claws
Meanwhile, my whole world is collapsing

The congregation's nervous, especially bride-to-be
There's three of them she'd rather have gone down on bended knee
Credits roll on "Speak up now, or forever hold your peace"
Meanwhile, my whole world is collapsing

[Chorus 1]
It's pretty odd, some two-bob god
Can somehow grip the nation
But maybe to us sad old mares
It's a form of consolation

Makes us feel creative in a life minus creation
Meanwhile, our whole world is collapsing
Look out on the streets outside, catch a conversation
The whole wide world is collapsing

[Verse 2]
The oldest of the brothers the audience thought was dead
Returns to find his sister and his wife tucked up in bed
If this is true to life, feed me fantasy instead
Meanwhile, the whole world is collapsing
[Chorus 2]
It's pretty odd, some two-bob god
Can somehow grip the nation
But maybe to us sad old mares
It's a form of consolation

Makes us feel creative in a life minus creation
Meanwhile, our whole world is collapsing
Riots on the streets outside, tearing up the nation
The whole wide world is collapsing

[Outro]
These petty little problems they bring into our home
We actually tend to laugh about 'cause ours would not get shown
And suffering's so much funnier when it's theirs and not your own
Meanwhile, your whole world is collapsing

[Chorus 1]