[LADY BEACONSFIELD]
Lord and Lady Hare
Fighting over there
Darling, do beware
She's a bitch!

[LORD SAVAGE]
Lady Aberdare's
Having an affair
With the butler there
Just her niche!

[VICIOUS PARTY GUESTS]
Fine party
Divine party
A touch tarty
But stinkin' rich!

[LADY BEACONSFIELD]
What a pretty smile
Mrs Grenville-Heath!
Pity they are not all her teeth

[LORD SAVAGE]
Lord de Vere as well
He's as queer as hell
And bi-sexuelle
Likes to switch!
[ALL]
Delicious, and so vicious
Our one wish is to
Bitch, bitch, bitch

[BUTLER]
Lady Postlethwaite

[LADY BEACONSFIELD]
God, she's put on weight!

[LORD SAVAGE]
Gives you more to hate!

[LADY BEACONSFIELD]
Mean old bitch!

[BUTLER]
Lady Leopold

[LORD SAVAGE]
Looking really old!

[LADY BEACONSFIELD]
Poor Sir Leopold
[LORD SAVAGE]
She's a witch!

[ALL]
Chic people
Unique people
And freak people
We quickly ditch

[BUTLER]
Lady Delaware

[LADY BEACONSFIELD]
Awful colour hair!
That's her lover there
With the twitch!

[BUTLER]
Lord and Lady Biggs

[LORD SAVAGE]
What a pair of pigs!
Wear each other's wigs

[LORD SAVAGE & LADY BEACONSFIELD]
Itch! Itch! Itch!
[ALL]
June wedding
The bride's dreading
The leg-spreading
While London's rich
Come here and
Bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch, bitch, bitch!