[STAN]
What would Brian Boitano do
If he was here right now?
He'd make a plan, and he'd follow through
That's what Brian Boitano'd do!

[KYLE]
When Brian Boitano was in the Olympics
Skating for the gold
He did two Salchows and a triple Lutz
While wearing a blindfold

[CARTMAN]
When Brian Boitano was in the Alps
Fighting grizzly bears
He used his magical fire breath
And saved the maidens fair

[STAN, KYLE]
So what would Brian Boitano do
If he were here today?
I'm sure he'd kick an ass or two
That's what Brian Boitano'd do!

[CARTMAN]
I want this V-chip out of me
It has stunted my vocabulary