Dumbledore: Good evening, children!

All: Good evening, Professor Dumbledore!

Dumbledore: I heard it was somebody’s birthday today!

Harry Potter (whisper): Birthday?

Ron Weasley (whisper): What’s a birthday?

Harry Potter (whisper): Hmm? No.

Hermione Granger (whisper): I don’t know about that...

Harry Potter (whisper): Not mine. Hermione?

Hermione Granger (whisper): No.

Harry Potter (whisper): Ron?

Ron Weasley (whisper): No.

Hermione Granger: No, Professor. It’s no one’s birthday.

Dumbledore: YOU QUESTION THE HEADMASTER?!
Hermione Granger: Yes.

Dumbledore: Well, too bad. I know it’s one of yall’s birthday, and you know what that means!

Hermione & Harry: Uuuggghhh...

Ron Weasley: We get gift cards?

Dumbledore: You must all sing along for the Happy Hogwarts Birthday song!

All: Uuuggghhh...

Dumbledore: *clears throat*