Ed Helms
How Bad Can I Be?
[Intro]
Bad? I'm not bad, I'm the good guy here, he just doesn't get it
Do you think I'm bad? (Ack) Thank you
I mean, something good finally happens to me
And he just has to come along and rain on my parade, what’s his problem? (Ack) See?
Yeah, bad, right (Ack)

[Chorus]
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just doing what comes naturally
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just following my destiny
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just doing what comes naturally
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
How bad can I possibly be?

[Verse 1]
Well, there's a principle of nature (Principle of nature)
That almost every creature knows
Called "Survival of the Fittest" (Survival of the Fittest)
And check it, this is how it goes:
The animal that wins gotta scratch and fight
And claw, and bite, and punch!
And the animal that doesn't, well the animal that doesn't
Winds up someone else's lu-lu-lu-lu-lunch
(Munch, munch, munch, munch, munch)
I'm just sayin'!
[Chorus]
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just doing what comes naturally
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just following my destiny
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just doing what comes naturally
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
How bad can I possibly be? (Ah!)

[Verse 2]
There's a principle in business (Principle in business)
That everybody knows is sound
It says the people with the money (People with the money)
Make this ever-loving world go 'round
So I'm biggering my company, I'm biggering my factory
I'm biggering my corporate sign!
(Bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger!)
Everybody out there, you take care of yours
And me? I'll take care of
Mine, mine, mine, mine, mine!
(Shake that bottom line!)

[Bridge]
Let me hear you say, "Smogulous smoke"! (Smogulous smoke!)
"Schloppity schlop!" (Schloppity schlop!)
Complain all you want, it's never ever, ever, ever gonna stop (Stop!)
Come on, how bad can I possibly be?
[Chorus]
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
I'm just building the economy
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
Just look at me pettin' this puppy!
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
A portion of proceeds goes to charity
How ba-a-a-ad can I be?
How bad can I possibly be? Let's see

[Post-Chorus]
(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?)
All the customers are buying!
(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?)
And the money's multiplying!
(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?)
And the PR people are lying!
(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?)
And the lawyers are denying!
(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?)
Who cares if a few trees are dying?
(How ba-a-a-ad can I be?)
This is all so gratifying!

[Outro]
How bad
How bad can this possibly be?