[Verse 1]
I'd like to drop my trousers to the world
I am a man of means (of slender means)
Each household appliance is like a new science in my town

[Refrain]
And if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably jump in the ocean

[Chorus]
And when a train goes by it's such a sad sound
(Da, dum, da-dum, da-dee-dah-dah, da-dee-da-dum)
It's such a sad thing

[Verse 2]
I'd like to drop my trousers to the Queen
Every sensible child will know what this means
The poor and the needy are selfish and greedy on her terms

[Refrain]
And if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably jump in thе ocean

[Chorus]
And when a train goes by it's such a sad sound
(Da, dum, da-dum, da-da-dah, da-dee-da-da-da-dum)
It's such a sad thing
[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 3]
And whеn I'm lying in my bed
I think about life and I think about death
And neither one particularly appeals to me

[Outro]
And if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I'd get such a shock I'd probably lie
In the middle of the street and die
I'd lie down and die