[Verse 1]
Smiffy was a little boy, different from the rest
He had one eye pointing east and one pointing west
Ever since Tiny Murphy hit him with a sling
Smiffy with his glass eye glittering

[Verse 2]
Playing in the school yard, how the kids would marvel
When Smiffy popped his glass 'un out and used it for a marble
He was such a character the kids would sing
Smiffy with his glass eye glittering

[Verse 3]
Walking down the street when two big louts
Come and tripped up Smiffy and his eye fell out
They used it as a conker on a piece of string
Smiffy with his glass eye glittering

[Bridge]
The girls all laughed when Smiffy passed them by
They called him Cyclops, he only had one eye
He never had a girlfriend or that sort of thing
Smiffy with his glass eye glittering
"Ooh, there's Smiffy coming to the Infirmary
He's got a glass eye, you ken"
"No you're joking, how'd you find out?"
"Och, it just came out in conversation"
[Verse 4]
Smiffy used to dream of the Judgment Day
When the flood came and carried all his school-friends away
He was lifted up to Heaven on an angel's wing
Smiffy with his glass eye glittering

[Verse 5]
Nobody cried when his world fell apart
And poor Smiffy died of a broken heart
You have to turn a blind eye to that sort of thing
Smiffy with his glass eye glittering