I don't ever wanna get laid again
It’s the thought of the pussy that does me in
I don't like the taste or the smell or the feeling
I could definitely use some non-sex healing

I know pussy is gross, but that's the way it goes
Getting laid hurts, it causes such pain
Like walking across hot coals
Every single girl I meet offers me pussy
But I gotta turn it down
Wet slit, soft clit, hard tits, so slimy
It’s hell on earth and I hope you'll believe me

I don't ever wanna get laid again
It's the thought of the pussy that does me in
I don't like the taste or the smell or the feeling
I could definitely use some non-sex healing

Fuckin' around with my homies, drivin' down the strip
A girl sneaks up to me and shows me her tits
I started screaming, my heart started racing
I quickly changed the direction I was facing
"My juices are wet, I need you inside me"
I started smashing windows, but I did it politely
She righted her bra and slid on a nightie
And suddenly, relief struck me like lightning
Success, I couldn't see any of that gross shit
But little did I know the worst came next
Oh shit, another pussy attack
A pair of super spread legs, right at my back
I started sobbing and shrieking, shooting my gun into the air
Her juices kept pouring, dripping through my hair
I thrashed like a fish, caught in a net
I knew that this one night I’d never forget
Felt pain in my guts and it seemed important
My dick had inverted and started fucking my organs
I leapt off the bridge, hopin’ to die
But the water was shallow because of low tide
All my bones broke including my back
The whole thing happened with a sickening crack
But the water felt way too warm to me
Had I somehow fallen into a pussy juice sea?
I blacked out, I couldn't take anymore
My life had been ruined by the pussy I abhor
I woke in the hospital ten weeks later
A full body cast and an intubator
The doctor came in, he said, "How are ya feelin’?"
I said, "I definitely need some non-sex healing"
Sex is so gross
Sex is so gross, oh-oh
Sex is so gross
Sex is so gross, oh-oh
Sex is so gross
Sex is so gross, oh-oh
Sex is so gross
Sex is so gross, oh-oh

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

I don't ever wanna get laid again
It's the thought of the pussy that does me in
I don't like the taste or the smell or the feeling
I could definitely use some non-sex healing

I don’t ever wanna get laid again
It's the thought of the pussy that does me in
I don't like the taste or the smell or the feeling
I could definitely use some non-sex healing

I don't ever wanna get laid again