[SALLY]
Look at me, with my pigtails so tight
You'd think that I might explode, right?
Look at me, with my arms in a twist
Not alarming I missed the right road
[MS. COOTER]
It's not too late
To turn around
And find a better way
[SALLY]
It's not up to fate
To lay the groundwork
For a better day
[MS. COOTER]
You gotta
Shake it up
Put your hair down darlin'
You really need to unwind
[SALLY]
I gotta pick it up
'Cause my life is calling
Me on the other line
It's time to start over
And today is like
The first day of the year
So get that chip off my shoulder!
'Cause it's weighing me down
And keeping you right here
[MS. COOTER]
I want to get out
See the great big world out there
[SALLY & MS. COOTER]
It's time to set out
'Cause I feel
There's something in the air
I might be losing my mind
But there's one thing that I know:
That I'm finally ready
So ready to go!
[SALLY]
Yeah, I'm finally ready
I'm ready to-
[JOEY, spoken]
Yo! You ready to go, or what?
[SALLY]
Oh, yeah! Alright, let's go!
[JOEY, sung]
Hey, Dick, does my hair look alright?
[DICK]
Hell yeah, buddy
You're a sight to see
[JOEY, spoken]
'Kay good.
(sung)
Listen up
Just try to relax,
Cause a mishap's
The last thing I need
I wanna rise up
To the next level
Get off this middle ground
I've got this yearnin'
Burnin' like the devil
I'm here for the rebound
Pass the ball
I know I'm on fire!
[DICK]
Yeah, yeah
You're on a roll!
[JOEY, spoken]
I know!
[DICK, sung]
What do you want
From your kingdom, sire?
[JOEY]
I wanna take control
Hyo!
I need a brand new game plan
No more warming benches
Like I've done before
[DICK]
Get your head in the game, man
(spoken)
Here's what I'm thinking-
[JOEY, sung]
Shit, she's comin'
Out that door!
[JOEY & DICK]
Ahhh!
Ahhh!
[JOEY]
Say yes, Vanessa
Yes, I must confess
Of my obsession with your design
I will not rest
No, not unless
I find a way to make you mine
I'm gonna get her
If it's the last thing
That I do
[DICK]
But just remember
You can't get her
[JOEY & DICK]
Without you/me too!
So buckle up, all you amateurs
'Cause today were goin' pro
We're finally ready
So ready to go!
[VANESSA, spoken]
Hello?
[TIFFANY, sung]
Hey Vaness
OMG, would you guess
That I'm not wearing
Undies today?
[VANESSA]
Eww
Oh, Tiff
LOL, what's the diff?
You would still
Take them off anyway
[TIFFANY]
IKR
[VANESSA]
BTW
[VANESSA & TIFFANY]
Where are you right now?
[TIFFANY]
We need to talk
[VANESSA]
Oh, I totes see you!
[VANESSA & TIFFANY]
BRB Ciao, ciao!
[OLD SNATCH, spoken]
How's ya doin', Flopsy?
[FLOPSY]
Oh hey there, you Old Snatch!
[OLD SNATCH, sung]
When you've been around
The block as much as I have
You feel just like a CEO
[FLOPSY, spoken]
Oh, how's that? That must feel nice.
[OLD SNATCH, sung]
You see, I'm done with all these cocks
But they're not lettin' me retire!
I tell ya, I'm ready to go!
[FLOPSY]
It's like living the same way
That an old pair of shoes do
Everyday's a one man show!
They start to stink, then there's holes
And they don't fit the way they used to
I've had it! I'm ready to go!
[OLD SNATCH, spoken]
Look at us
(sung)
We're just a couple of stiffs
[FLOPSY, spoken]
Ha! Now you're just being cute!
[OLD SNATCH, sung]
With a lifetime of "if's"
[FLOPSY, spoken]
Don't be so hard on us!
[OLD SNATCH, sung]
And I wonder
With someone else
Could life be more fair?
[FLOPSY, spoken]
Yeah! I mean it's not like...
(sung)
We're some one-dick pony
[OLD SNATCH, spoken]
Oh, now who's being cute?
[FLOPSY, sung]
We could be more if only
[OLD SNATCH & FLOPSY]
Someone out there
Would answer our prayer!
While's... we's...
Waits to be delivered
Go ahead, cry me a river
We agree that there's
No quid pro quo!
[FLOPSY]
So until that great vacation...
[OLD SNATCH, spoken]
Save your tears for lubrication!
[OLD SNATCH & FLOPSY, sung]
And lord have mercy
Are we ready to go!
Mercy, are we ready to go
[TIFFANY]
Listen up!
Vanessa, sweetie
I do this 'cause I care
[VANESSA, spoken]
I know.
[TIFFANY, sung]
This is war
Forget your peace treaty
Justice is right over there!
[VANESSA]
I guess I could use a new guy
'Cause it's been a while
And I am still so young
Why not give it a try?
At the very least it
Could be kinda fun
[TIFFANY]
Hey now, Vanessa
That's the girl
I know and love
[VANESSA]
I've been so boring
Boy, I'm glad
I had a little shove!
[VANESSA & TIFFANY]
Tick, tock
While the iron's hot
There's no time
To take it slow
You gotta be ready
So ready to-
[ALL]
Go
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
I'm ready to go
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
I'm ready to go
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
I'm ready to go
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
We're finally ready
And the time is right
For us to light a spark
We're keepin' it steady
With our eyes on the prize
To get us through the dark
I know there's so much more
To what I think I see
I feel a change and the
Strange thing is
It's part of me
My hormones are freakin' out
And I think I'm gonna blow!
[JOEY & DICK]
We're locked and loaded
[SALLY & MS. COOTER]
Oh, so devoted
[OLD SNATCH & FLOPSY]
Low and demoted
[VANESSA & TIFFANY]
Totes, just toted!
[ALL]
We're finally ready
So ready to go!
