Whenever people ask me why I live alone
I simply say, "It's agreeable"
I like my independance, I like living on my own
And I'll stay that way for the forseeable
But I'm not without a lover
We've been together years
He's the other half I looked for all my life
We never fight, we're best of friends
No trouble and no tears
And I get on even better with
His wife

Mr and Mrs and Me
We're about as happy as people can be
She makes his dinner, and bakes his favourite cookie
She gets the laundry
And I get the nookie
Though we know it's difficult for some to comprehend
Romance is romancier when you can bring a friend
And two is not as thrilling as three
For Mr and Mrs and Me

Mr and Mrs and Me
No messy rows, no emotional debris
While he goes down the gym to ensure he's fit and able
The two of us are working out next week's timetable
She's not the kind of woman who just doesn't understand
She often shouts encouragement, and sometimes lends a hand
And when he's wrong then she and I agree
That's Mr and Mrs and Me
He's gone as far as any man can go
Yet it's true he has his faults
And though we know that it takes two to tango
It takes three beats to make a waltz

Mr and Mrs and Me
He sits with one of us perched on each knee
He's careful to ensure we feel equally desired
And with three days off a week, neither one of us gets tired
I really can't recall a single moment of contention
I'll keep the memories, and she'll recieve the pension
She's the milk and I'm the sugar in his tea
That's Mr and Mrs and Me
Buy one get one free!
Mr and Mrs and Me