[Intro: JT Music & Andrea Storm Kaden]
Now this may sound far-out
But I hope you're listenin'
'Cause a nuclear Fallout is not improbable
No, it is imminent!
More than just for your protection
Here's the best long-term investment
You'll ever make for your family's sake!
Call Vault-Tec today!

[Verse 1: JT Music & Andrea Storm Kaden]
And I'll take you into my loving arms to guard you from the storm
There's a fire you've set in my heart with which I'll keep you warm
'Cause outside, it's helter-skelter, so come find us in our shelter
Sure, it's under a rock, but just knocks, and we'll welcome you home! (If you can afford it)
Oh, what's become of our great nation? It's a Wasteland on the surface
Which one day we will retake, repopulation is our purpose (We can maybe)
Noah's Ark was quite a vessel, although ours is twice as S.P.E.C.I.A.L
With room and board, and about twenty floors down below ground-level!

[Chorus 1: JT Music, Andrea Storm Kaden & Both]
So if you're all in with the Fallout, you've got Vault-Tec on your side!
Let me be the one to tell ya everything will be alright!
Just sign up today! We have plenty spots in our lead-encased concrete Camelot
Among family and friends, the end is a new beginning!
[Verse 2: JT Music, Andrea Storm Kaden & Both]
Having children can be such a blessing, but what if they end up mutated?
We can prevent that from happening as long as we aren't related!
You've gotta treat your relatives like radiation
Because a sexy cousin's something you should stay away from (uh, not again!)
Your job is assigned by aptitude tests
You'll work 'till you die, so make sure it's correct!
But hey, buried alive is better than just being buried!

[Chorus 2: JT Music, Andrea Storm Kaden & Both]
So if you're all in with the Fallout, you've got Vault-Tec on your side!
Let me be the one to tell ya everything will be alright!
If we keep out the rads, we'll outlive the Reds, I won't become that, I'd rather be dead!
Because capitalism will stimulate our economy! (Or whatever's left of it)

[Verse 3: JT Music, Andrea Storm Kaden & Both]
Where the working man is not taken for granted!
When you come home, I'll always have your dinner warmed up!
We're a proper family: nuclear! Hey pops, I want a root beer!
Scotty, all we got is Nuka-Cola! (Avaliable of participating vault locations)
Always the same, war, it never changes, so no wonder why we're under surveillance
Can we keep our way of life alive and well?
To be a paragon comes with privilege, from apocalypse to a picket fence
The American Dream will thrive, even in Hell!

[Chorus 3: JT Music, Andrea Storm Kaden & Both]
I guess I'm all in with the Fallout, I've got Vault-Tec on my side!
Let me be the one to tell ya every fucking thing will be alright!
If you ever have roaches infest your vault, they're no better than those investing in vaults
Didn't hear that from me, we're just here to sing this song! (come on, sing along!)
Because we're all in with the Fallout, we've got Vault-Tec on our side!
And believe us when we tell ya everything's probably alright!
If the bombs should go off, starting today, and you haven't called, you're already late
Go on, drop us a line! This was brought to you by Vault-Tec!