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National Lampoon
Closet Queen
Closet Queen come out and play
Change that gabardine to gold lame
Why deny the guy you are?
Throw away that fat cigar
Hitch you heinie to a star
Oh, Closet Queen
When a Closet Queen plays butch he knows
He can't make the scene in Gucci clothes
You dress in Abercrombie boots
But you’re no macho zombie, toots
You're Henri Bendel at the roots
Whoa, Closet Queen