[Intro]
I want every single person to know
That I am truly sorry
From the bottom of my balls
I am so sorry
That I left my pubes on the toilet seat!

[Verse 1]
You want apologies? Well here's one
I was manscaping and
I missed some during clean-up
I was in a hurry, had an itch in my Nethers
Didn't mean to leave the shavings
I'm not home right now
But there's a vacuum somewhere
Turn it on and suck up
What's remaining of my gooch beard
You wanna clean all my trimmings?
You wanna clean it good
You gotta use some lysol wipes

Here we go
Here we go
Here we go
Let's clean 'em up
[Chorus (2x)]
Clean my pubes, I'll pay you
If you don't like it then just
Wait until I get home
The carpets match the drapes
I'll do the dishes so I can make it up to you

So go ahead and leave out dish detergent

[Verse 2]
Thr33v3 in da house!
It's 2016, and I got some dank memes
Like Chodezilla on your Facebook
For good shitposting
This song is just a ploy to gain more followers
I see you, Bus 15
Christ, Larry! Please, keep your voice down!
([?] Godamn it!)

Are you done?
With my pubes?
Did you clean my mess?

[Chorus (2x)]

[Bridge 1]
Your pubes don't miss the toilet
But mine seem to get everywhere
Please tell me, what's your secret?
Do you trim, or wax instead?
Let me solicit something
Spreading memes
Here we go

[Verse 3]
Remember what I said about liking Chodezilla?
It's actually a real thing you can find on FaceBook
Want some memes your dad won't understand?
Well go and like the page so I can build my brand

[Chorus (2x)]

[Bridge 2]
I've got to make a point
That this song sounds just like
Sylar's last album
I'm guessing nu-metal is trendy now
Gotta please the crowd
With this 2000's sound

[Outro]
Hahaha! Oh yeah!
I am so sorry! Heheheh!
But seriously though, it was really inconsiderate to just leave this morning without tidying up the bathroom. But I mean I'm not gonna do it in the shower because the hairs can clog the drain, but that's aside from the point. I won't do it again, and you're right. I should be doing more to help out around the hose. You have a life too, and I shouldn't be inconveniencing you like this, so I'll be better
Sike! I was just kidding!