[Intro]
Yes indeed, here we are!

[Verse 1]
At St. Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
Where I stole the mar-juh-rene
And wheedled on the Bingo cards
In lieu of the latrine
I saw a handsome parish lady
Make her entrance like a queen
While she was totally chenille
And her old man was a Marine

[Verse 2]
As she abused a sausage pattie
And said, "Why don't you treat me mean?"
(Hurt me, hurt me, hurt me, oooooh!)
At St. Alfonzo's Pancake Breakfast
(Wow! Good God! Get off the bus!)
Where I stole the mar-juh-rene

[Instrumental Break]

[Outro]
St. Alfonzo, St. Alfonzo
St. Alfonzo, St. Alfonzo
Ooh-aah