Hey! Do you know what you are?
You're an asshole! ASSHOLE!

Some of you might not agree
'Cause you probably likes a lot of misery
But think a while and you will see . .
Broken hearts are for assholes
Broken hearts are for assholes
Are you an asshole?
Broken hearts are for assholes
Are you an asshole too?
Whatcha gonna do, 'cause you're an asshole . .

No no no, yeah yeah yeah
I said that
You . . . are . . . an ASSHOLE!

Maybe you think you're a lonely guy
'N maybe you think you're too tough to cry
So you went to The Grape
Just to give it a try
And Dagmar
(A beautiful lady)
Was his name . .
(Alive an living in leather)
The whiskers sticking out from underneath of his Pancake make-up
Nearly drove you insane
(Next week it’s all n*** wrestling)
And so you kissed a little sailor
Who had just blew in from Spain
You pulled the chain attached to the permanently erected nipples of Jimmy
In a bold salute to pain
You sniffed the reeking buns of Angel
And acted like it was cocaine
You were dazzled by the exciting new costume of Ko-Ko
In a way you can't explain
And so you worked the wall with Michael
Which gave your back an awful strain
But you came back on Sunday for the gong show
But you forgot what I was sayin'
'Cause you're an asshole, You're an asshole
You're an asshole, you're an asshole
You're an asshole, you're an asshole
You're an asshole, you're an asshole
Well, now you been to The Chest, you been to The Grape
Now I think you know what you are: you're an asshole

You say you can't live with what you've been through
Well, ladies you can be an asshole too
You might pretend you ain't got one on the bottom of you
But don't fool yerself girl
It's lookin' at you
Don't fool yerself girl
It's winkin' at you
Don't fool yerself girl
It's blinkin' at you
That's why I say
I'm gonna ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
Ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
Ram it, ram it, ram it
Ram it up yer poop chute
(Meow)
Don't fool yerself, girl
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
Don't fool yerself, girl
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
Don't fool yerself, girl
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
(Ay ay ay ay)
Don't fool yerself, girl
It's goin' right up yer poop chute
(Ay ay ay ay)
Don't fool yerself, girl
It's goin' right up yer poooop chute
(Ay ay ay ay ay ay ay ay)
Don't fool yerself, girl
It's goin' right up yer . .
Oh I knew you’d be surprised, buddy