The Mystery Man came over
An' he said: "I'm outa-site!"
He said, for a nominal service charge
I could reach Nirvana t'nite
If I was ready, willing 'n able
To pay him his regular fee
Why, he would drop all the rest of his pressing affairs
And devote His Attention to me
But I said . .
Look here brother
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Well . . . ) (Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris? Why don't you sharpen it then?)
Look here brother
Don't you waste your time on . .

The Mystery Man got nervous
An' he fidget around a bit
He reached in the pocket of his Mystery Robe
An' he whipped out a shaving kit
Now, I thought it was a razor
An' a can of foamin' goo
But he told me right then when the top popped open
There was nothin' his box won't do
With the oil of Afro-dytee (Well . . . )
An' the dust of the Grand Wazoo
He said:
"You might not believe this, Mort, but it'll cure your crab cakes too!"
An' I said hey . .
Hey, look here Morty
(Morty?)
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Yes, indeed, who are you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?)
Look here brother
Don't you waste your time on . .
Go man, go . .

George: Well . .
Napoleon: Well . .
FZ: Well . . . Hratche-plche, hratche . . . Well . .
Napoleon: Crab
George: Well . .

I've got troubles of my own, I said
An' you can't help me out
So take your meditations an' your preparations
An' ram it up yer . .
"BUT I GOT A KRISTL BOL!," he said
An' he held it on up to the light
So I snatched it
All away from him
An' I showed him how to do it right
(Yes, let's boogie!)
I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head
So I'd look like I was Deep
I said some Mumbo Jumbos then
An' told him he was goin' to sleep
I robbed his rings
An' pocket watch
An' everything else I found, yeah!
I had that sucker hypnotized
He couldn't even make a sound
I proceeded to tell him his future then
As long as he was hanging around
I said
"The price of meat has just gone . .
An' yer ol' lady has just gone . . . "
Look here brother
(Look here brother)
Who you jivin' with that Cosmik Debris?
(Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho?
Or is it Bob Duffy's pants?)
Don't you know
You could make more money as a butcher
So don't you waste your waste on me