What's a girl like you
Doin’ in a place like this?

I left my place after midnight
And I came to the club
Me and my girlfriend, we came here
Lookin' for love

You came to the right place
This is it
This is the swingin-est place
In New York City

NO SHIT!

How true that is

How true indeed

Me and my, me and my girlfriend, we come here
Every Friday, Saturday-night looking for the
HOT romance we need
We like to get it on
Do you like to get it on too?

Well, what did you have in mind?
Well listen, well, I get off bein' juked
With a baby octopus
Or spewed upon with creamed corn! Aaaah . . . unh!
An’ my girlfriend, she digs it
With a hot Seven-Up bottle
While somebody's yellin:
"CORKS 'N SAFETIES
CORKS 'N SAFETIES"

Gets me so hot, I could scream:

"CORKS 'N SAFETIES, CORKS 'N SAFETIES OOHOOOO
CORKS 'N SAFETIES, CORKS 'N SAFETIES WOWWWW"
You two chicks sound real far out and groovy
Ever been to a Holiday Inn?
Mna-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-haa . .
Magic fingers in the bed
Wall-mounted TV screens:
Coffee-Host plugged into the bathroom wall
Formica’s really keen!

What kind of girl do you think we are
What kind of girl do you think we are
Don’t call us groupies, that is going too far
We wouldn't ball you just because you’re a star
These girls wouldn't let just anybody
Spew on their vital parts
They want a guy from a group with a
Big hit single in the charts

Funny you should mention it:
Our new single made the charts this week
With a bullet! With a bullet!
Just let me put a little more
Tinsel glitter on my face right now, Baby
And you can show me how a young girl such as you
Might be thrilled and overwhelmed by me . .

What Holiday Inn you said you were staying at?

Wanna split right away?

Not so fast, you silly boy . . . there's one thing we gotta say:

We wanna a guy from a group
Who's got a thing in the charts [x4]

And if his dick is a monster
If his dick is a monster
If his dick is a monster
They will give him their hearts . .
Hold it, hold it, hold it, god. Stop the music. Why didn’t you say so before!