I've got the thing you need
I am endowed beyond your wildest
Clearasil spattered fantasies, oh oh oh oh oh oh . .

Girls from all over the world
Flock to write my name on the toilet walls
Of the "Whisky a Go Go"
For I am Bwana Dik
He is Bwana Dik
Him Bwana Dik
Me Bwana Dik

My dick is a monster
Give me your heart

Bwana Dick is a legend
Enormous thou art

My dick is a Harley
You kick it to start

Bwana Dik speaks
The heavens will part

My dick is a dagger
I'll force it to fit
My dick is a reamer, baby
To scream up your slit
Steam it! Steam it! Ream it! Cream it!

You can hear the steam
You can hear the screaming steam
As the reamer steams up the lake
To the snake and the black velvet crystal
Naugahyde black, electric vibraphonic micromatic, crystal black plastic
Plastic battery-operated steamroller!

Help me, help me, help me, help me