?: Won't you give me an A sharp?
FZ: If the Monkees were doing this show they’d already be tuned up
?: Who would care?
FZ: In E
?: E-e-e-e-e
FZ: Awright that's good enough. Here we go. Tawdriness. One, two, three, four

Bringing in the sheaves
Bringing in the sheaves
We will come rejoicing
Bringing in the sheaves

L.A. in the summer of '69
I went downtown and bought some wine
Wasted my head on three quarts of juice
And now the grapes won’t turn me loose
I'm a wino man
Don't you know I am
Oh, wow-wow

36, 24, hips about 30
I seen a fine lady and I started talkin' dirty
She looked at me and raised her thumb
And said: "Jam down the road, you funky-ass bum"
I'm a wino man
Don't you know I am?
Oh, wow-ow
I, I went to the country
And while I was gone
A roller-headed lady
Caught me weedling on her lawn
I'm so ashamed, 'cause I’m a wino man
And I can’t help myself
HELP ME SOMEBODY!

I'm a wino man
Don’t you know I am?

My saxophone playing
And my wino career are in a slump
'Cause I find myself now living
In a cardboard refrigerator box down by the Houston dump
And I'm so ashamed

I've been drinkin’ all night till my eyes are all red
Crashed in the gutter, got bugs in my head
Bugs in my coat, been scratchin' like a dog
I can't stand water, and I stink like a hog
Give me fi-i-i-i-i-ive bucks
And a hot meal
Give me fi-i-i-i-i-ive bucks
And a hot meal
Oh, yeah