Ladies and gentlemen, Bruce Fowler, with a genuine jazz avant-garde jazz trombone solo. Now as if that weren't enough for Halloween, Bruce Fowler has invented a special imported Mormon jazz ballet, which is brought to us all the way from Salt Lake City, Utah, and he and his lovely assistant, Napoleon, are gonna demonstrate this fantastic relic of the be-bop age for you right here live on stage at the Auditorium Theatre. Pay close attention now. Don't take your eyes off their feet for a moment. Here they go

This is be-bop
Even though you think it doesn't sound like that

Wait a minute!

Hey, it sort of sounds like be-bop but I'm not sure, George, it's so abstract

George, let me tell you something, George, you are not gonna get any pussy in Chicago singing be-bop. You know what I mean?

Oh, yeah!
As I was saying . .

Yeah. Now, that's ethereal, George. You know, the kids can get into that, it's sort of psychedelic with a rising upward motion

George, George . . . George, it's growing on me. I think I— I think even I could learn to enjoy be-bop. Please, George, sing me some more be-bop

Oh, that's so suave!

Oh, yeah!

But meanwhile, over in the corner, Ruth "Still Smelling As Good As The Last Show" Underwood is ready to play her hot be-bop lick on the marimba. Take it away, Ruth!

Rhapsodic!
Contestant #1, Ralph Humphrey! Contestant #2, Chester Thompson!

I wanna tell you one thing right here
Wanna tell you one thing right now
Well, you run around [and you're sure] you got a little gas
All you need is some [Earth Nine] Tonic
It'll cure your gas
Rheumatism
Funky feet
Bad breath
Bad ears
[...]
Bad hair
Yeah!

Thank you!