Peter: Mr Booze

Audience: Mr Booze

Peter: Mr Booze

Mr B Double O Z E

Brian & Bruce: That sure spells booze

Peter: You will wind up wearing tattered shoes, if you mess with Mr. Booze

Brian & Bruce: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Peter: Don't mess with Mr. B-Double O-Z-E

If you been so stiff they thought you died

You'll feel better once you've testified

Audience: Testify

Bruce: Oh yeah!
Audience: Testify

Audience: Testify

Bruce: I wanna testify, I wanna testify!

Peter: Well then cleanse yourself my son, cleanse yourself!

Bruce: One time I took a library book out and I fells asleep reading it and I left it under the bed. I forgot about it for three and a half years. I was gonna take it back on Amnesty Day, but on Amnesty Day I had a sip of Rosé wine and I never made it out of the house

Peter: Who's to blame?

Audience: Who's to blame?

Peter: What's his name?

Audience: We know his name, his name is

Mr. Booze

Mr. Booze

Mr. B-Double O-Z-E don't ever choose

Any game you play with him, you'll lose, so don't mess with Mr. Booze!
Peter: If your head feels like it's two miles wide

Audience: Two miles wide!

Peter: You'll feel better once you've testified

Audience: Testified

Brian: Oh Yeah

Audience: Testify

Carl: I wanna testify, I wanna testify!

Peter: Well come forward dear brother and testify!

Carl: I used to be a soda pop guy. Then I switched to the bottle. Now I don't leave my couch and I've seen every movie ever. You name a movie, I've seen it

Audience: Meet Dave

Carl: Seen it

Audience: The Eiger Sanction

Carl: Seen it
Audience: Donovan's Reef

Carl: Seen it

Audience: License to Drive!

Carl: Definitely seen it

Peter, Bruce & Brian: That's a shame

Audience: What a shame

Peter, Bruce & Brian: Who's to blame

Audience: for Corey Haim?

His name is

Mr. Booze

Mr. Booze

Mr. B-Double O-Z-E you must refuse

You'll make the obituary news

If you mess with Mr. Booze

If you've been so stiff they'd thought you died

You'll feel better once you've testified

Testify

Testify

Tom Tucker: This man wants to testify

Peter: Very well my brother

Let us lead him on the path of righteousness

Tom: This poor gentleman used to speak in long, eloquent sentences. But after years of drinking he can only speak in short, choppy utterances

Why, at one time, if you asked him who his favorite musicians were he'd say Leonard Bernstein, Johann Sebastian Bach and Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. But thanks to that old devil hooch, it's all changed

Who's your favorite musician, Ollie?

Ollie Williams: Cher!

Tom: He doesn't even like Cher

Brian: Now alcohol makes a big man small

And can lead to a life of crime

Audience: Yeah!

Bruce: Demon rum makes a gent a bum

And cash in before your time

Audience: Yeah!

Dr. Hartman: Bootleg gin puts you in a spin

Till you don't even know your name

Audience: Yeah!

Peter: You're a basket case flat on your face

And there's only one guy to blame

Audience: Mr. B-Double O-Z-E

Mr. Booze

Mr. Booze

Mr. B-Double O-Z-E Don't ever choose

Peter: You will wind up wearing tattered shoes

If you mess with Mr. Booze

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Peter: Oh Mr. Booze

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Peter: Oh Mr. Booze

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Brian: Don't mess with B-Double O-Z-E

'Cause that spells booze

And your gonna lose with Mr. Booze

Audience: Oh, Yeah!

Brian: Don't mess around with Mr. Booze

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Bruce: That's what he said now

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Peter: Oh Mr. Booze

Audience: Don't mess with Mr. Booze

Don't mess with Mr. ...

Don't mess with Mr. ...

Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Don't mess with ah-ah

Oh Mr. Booze

Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh

Yeah!