[Spoken Intro]
All their windows were dark
And no one knew he was there
All the Whos were all dreaming
Sweet dreams without care

[Verse 1]
You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch
You really are a heel
You're as cuddly as a cactus
You're as charming as an eel, Mr. Grinch
You're a bad banana with a greasy black peel

[Verse 2]
You're a monster, Mr. Grinch
Your heart's an empty hole
Your brain is full of spiders
You've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Grinch
I wouldn't touch you with a 39 1/2 foot pole

[Interlude]
All I need is a reindeer
So he took his dog Max, and he took some black thread
And he tied a big horn on the top of his head
Then the Grinch said, "Giddyup!"
And the sleigh started down toward the homes
Where the Who's lay a-snooze in their town
"Oh yeah! This is stop number one!"
The old Grinchy Claus hissed as he climbed to the roof
Empty bags in his fist
Then he slid down the chimney, a rather tight pinch
But if Santa Claus could do it, then so could the Grinch

Then he slithered and slumped with a smile most unpleasant
Around the whole room, and he took every present
Popguns, panpoolers, pantookers, and drums
Checkboards, bisslebings, popcorn, and plums

And he stuffed them in the bags
Then the Grinch very nimbly stuffed all the bags, one by one
Up the chimney

[Verse 3]
You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch
You're a nasty, wasty skunk
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk, Mr. Grinch
The three best words that best describe you are as follows
And I quote:
Stink!
Stank!
Stunk!
[Verse 4]
You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch
With a nauseous super nos
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked horse, Mr. Grinch
You're a three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich
With arsenic sauce