[Verse 1]
I've lived in apartments, I've lived in a home
I've traveled in trailers when I used to roam
But now in these places, you won't catch me dead
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 2]
I do what I want to, no worries, no cares
If anyone bugs me, I climb mental stairs
Way up to a level where astronauts tread
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 3]
It's here time means nothing, I couldn't care less
I don't run for buses and trains are a mess
There's no lawn to care for, I don't make a bed
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 4]
I like how I'm living, I'm nobody's slave
My head's above water, so don't make a wave
There's no door to lock and no dog to be fed
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 5]
So why should I move when the neighborhood's right?
No taxes to pay and no landlord to fight
Now I call this living once more as I've said
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head
[Verse 6]
Now you keep your ulcers, your ills and what's new
You sure couldn't have them and live like I do
You think I have problems, but you do instead
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 7]
I live with two people, I like both of them
He likes both of me and I like both of him
They're my alter egos and to them I'm wed
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 8]
There's no symbol status in my neighborhood
It's that kind of thinking that keeps it so good
I don't take the lead, but I like to be led
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 1 & 5]
I've lived in apartments, I've lived in a home
(So why should I move when the neighborhood's right?)
I've traveled in trailers when I used to roam
(No taxes to pay and no landlord to fight)
But now in these places, you won't catch me dead
(Now I call this living once more as I've said)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head
[Verse 2 & 6]
I do what I want to, no worries, no cares
(Now you keep your ulcers, your ills and what's new)
If anyone bugs me, I climb mental stairs
(You sure couldn't have them and live like I do)
Way up to a level where astronauts tread
(You think I have problems, but you do instead)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 3 & 7]
It's here time means nothing, I couldn't care less
(I live with two people, I like both of them)
I don't run for buses and trains are a mess
(He likes both of me and I like both of him)
There's no lawn to care for, I don't make a bed
(They're my alter egos and to them I'm wed)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 4 & 8]
I like how I'm living, I'm nobody's slave
(There's no symbol status in my neighborhood)
My head's above water, so don't make a wave
(It's that kind of thinking that keeps it so good)
There's no door to lock and no dog to be fed
(I don't take the lead, but I like to be led)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head
[Verse 5 & 1]
So why should I move when the neighborhood's right?
(I've lived in apartments, I've lived in a home)
No taxes to pay and no landlord to fight
(I've traveled in trailers when I used to roam)
Now I call this living once more as I've said
(But now in these places, you won't catch me dead)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 6 & 2]
Now you keep your ulcers, your ills and what's new
(I do what I want to, no worries, no cares)
You sure couldn't have them and live like I do
(If anyone bugs me, I climb mental stairs)
You think I have problems, but you do instead
(Way up to a level where astronauts tread)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 7 & 3]
I live with two people, I like both of them
(It's here time means nothing, I couldn't care less)
He likes both of me and I like both of him
(I don't run for buses and trains are a mess)
They're my alter egos and to them I'm wed
(There's no lawn to care for, I don't make a bed)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Verse 8 & 4]
There's no symbol status in my neighborhood
(I like how I'm living, I'm nobody's slave)
It's that kind of thinking that keeps it so good
(My head's above water, so don't make a wave)
I don't take the lead, but I like to be led
(There's no door to lock and no dog to be fed)
'Cause I'm happy I live in a split-level head

[Outro]
What did he say? Well, I don't know what he said
(What'd he say? What'd he say? I don't know what he said)
Do you know what he said? No, I don't know what he said
(What'd he say? You know what he said?)
What'd they say? I don't know what they said, what'd they say?
(I don't know what he said, what'd he say?)
What'd he say? Did you hear what they said? I don't know what they said
(You know what he said? I don't know what he said, what'd he say?)