A lot of people ask me
Stupid Fuckin' questions
A lot of poeple think that
What I say on a record or what I talk about on a record
That I actually do in real life
Or that I believe in it
Or if say that i wanna kill somebody then I'm actually gonna do it
Or that I believe in it
Hmm shit
If you believe that
Then I'll kill you
You know why?
Cuz i'm a CRIMINAL! CRIMINAL!
You're goddamn right
I'm a CRIMINAL! yea i'm a CRIMINAL!

My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge
And I'll stab you in the head whether you're a fag or lez
But a homo sex a maph or trans or lez pants or dress
Hate fags the answer's yes
Homophobic? Nah your just Hederophobic
Staring at my jeans watchin my genitals bulgin
That's my motherfuckin' balls you better let go of em'
They belong in my scrodem you'll never get hold of em'
Hey it's me Versache, look somebody shot me
And I was just checkin' the mail
Get it?
Checkin' the male
How many records you expecting to sell
After your second LP sends you directly to jail?
Come on relax guy, I like gay men right ken?
Give me an a men, "a men!"
Please lord, this boy needs Jesus
He's our only child help us destroy these
Demons oh and please send me a
Brand new car and a prostitute
While my wife's sick in the hospital
Preacher, preacher, fifth grade teacher
You can't reach me my mom can't neither
You can't teach my a goddamn thing
Cuz I watch TV and com cast cable
And you ain't able to stop these thoughts
You can't stop me from toppin' these charts
And you can't stop me from droppin each March
With a brand new CD for these fuckin' retards
And to think it's just little old me
Mr. don't give a fuck still won't leave

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme
These people think that it's a crime to
Tell em' what's on my mind
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word
I just flip em' the bird and
Keep goin' I don't take shit from no one
I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme
These people think that it's a crime to
Tell em' what's on my mind
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word
I just flip em' the bird and keep goin'
I don't take shit from no one

My mother did drugs, hard liquor
Cigarettes, and speed
The baby came out disfigured
Ligaments and knee it's a seed
That would grow up just as crazy as she
Don't dare make fun of that baby
Cuz that baby was me

I'm a CRIMINAL!
An animal caged to turn crazed
But how the fuck you supposed
To grow up when you weren't raised
So as I got older, and I got a lot taller
My dick shrunk smaller and my balls got larger
I drank more liquor to fuck you up quicker
Then you'd wanna fuck me up for sayin the word
My motors went (fart)
When the president got home
Sex in his oval office on top of his desk
He was all his own employee
Don't ignore me you won't avoid me
You can't miss me i'm white blonde hair
And my nose is pointy I'm the bad guy
Who makes fun of people that die
In plane crashes and laugh as long
As it ain't happenen to him
Slim Shady I'm as crazy as him
And Kim combined, (the maniac's in)
The place is the doc because
Dre couldn't make it today
He's a little under the weather
So I'm takin' his place
Oh that's DRE with an AK to his face
Don't make me kill him too