[Intro: Eminem, DJ Kay Slay]
Turn that [?] off
A'ight, yo (Exclusive Eminem freestyle)

[Verse 1: Eminem]
My music is soothin' but it's also been proven
That it can put you in the mood to jump outta your car while it's movin'
You been waitin' on this moment, my sermon is like a omen
I'm servin', I'm Erick Sermon, I saw the window was open
And I jumped through it, my shit if you don't get pumped to it
I quit, here's my rhyme book, go 'head and thumb through it
And pick what you want from it, rummage and find somethin'
You can use to jump someone and roll up bumpin'
I'm constantly coppin' over you, squattin', shit has gotten
To the point where I ain't even writin' no more, I'm just jottin'
This is chicken scratch, shit is sickenin', I been kickin' ass
Off bullshit throwaway rhymes, pick a batch
I live for the love of rap, you crazy
I've made beats for Jay-Z for free, page me
You need a beat, you Canibus? Then it's Dre's fee
You Kay Slay? The fee's waived, I stay beefin'
With J.D. 'til the day Dre 2-ways me
That it's okay to stop blazin' him
Oops! I put it out, I 'pologize now
It's too late, G, it's on tape and the tape leaked
"Say What You Say," motherfucker
Drama King, Kay Slay, motherfucker
We dictate these mixtapes, motherfucker
Xzibit, blaze this little gay midget cocksucker
Haha
[Interlude: Xzibit]
Ladies and gentlemen
This is dedicated to the man we all love to hate
Tattoo a.k.a The Leprechaun a.k.a. Mr. Jermaine Dupri
Come on ladies and gentlemen, sing along

[Randy Newman - Short People Sample]
(Short people got) What! (No reason) Yeah!
(Short people got) What! (No reason) Come On!
(Short people got no reason to live)
Haha fuckin' faggot...

[Beat changes to the beat from Clipse's "Grindin'"]

[Verse 2: Xzibit]
If ya So So Def than bitch get a hearing aid
Ain't worth ya gauge ya heart pumping lemonade
Hook, line and sinker ya took the bait
Act ya age, not ya size, not ya weight
Every time you professional making hits
Why it always gotta sound like the next men shit?
Went from Big to Puff to Snoop to Jay
Hey Jermaine who's dick you gon' ride today?
Couldn't wait to get the green light from Dr. Dre
Never liked ya fuckin' ass any goddamn way
And I could care less if we label mates
Your style been dead Colombians should drop the weight
I got love for Da Brat get off Bow Wow back
Fuck you, fuck ya n***as that's writing ya raps
What up lo get ya L.A. pass revoked
Don't get me wrong Papa Smurf you won't get smoked
But ya might get robbed and choked
Or you might disappear, kidnapped with no ransom note
Off the leash, off the hook, off the chain
Fuck Jermaine you ain't gotta say my name
Speak now or forever hold a dick in ya mouth
You ain't the mayor, you don't run shit in the South
Scarface run the South motherfucker you will be on
The underage bitch in the Kelly tape getting pee'd on
Cock-eyed midget with a Napoleon complex
Nickelodeon fetish you represent nonsense
Harlem Shake to that, high jump to hell
You the best in the business, I can't tell
Too late to apologize kiss my ass
We about to cut your whole sound scan in half
Got to keep your hands up homie protect yo'self
Stop fucking with the West n***a respect yo'self
It's a short ride to the top and a long way down
Look Man vs. Machine about to drop now
This ain't no beef it's more like lunch meat
Loss caliber heat let's take it to the street muh'fucker
Ha ha...ha ha....ha ha.....ha ha ha ha ha ha....haaaa ha ha ha ha ha
Oh my god...yeah, yeah