[Verse 1]
I rolled my eyes, burst into tears
And how appropriate can you get?
The details emerged, the anger surged
I got to say I wish we never met

[Chorus]
Hey, a party cruise on the River Styx
And I suppose it's just as well
Oh-whoa-oh-oh, oh, it's so you
A Concorde ride, right to the Pearly Gates
Oh-whoa-oh-oh, oh, it's so you

[Verse 2]
You mom was mad at all your friends
And vice-versa, it wasn't cool
I couldn't read your eulogy
I told your dad we kind of had an office pool

[Chorus]
Hey, a party cruise on the River Styx
And I suppose it's the way to go
Oh-whoa-oh-oh, oh, it's so you
A Concorde ride, right to the Pearly Gates
Oh-whoa-oh-oh, oh, it's so you
[Bridge]
We threw you a big Irish wake
I know that you're Bolivian, but
You always were the biggest fake
We chose the path of least resistance
And most fun, and most fun, and most fun

[Outro]
Let the record show that I will fight your legend at every turn
All the stories that were never true and the rep that you didn't earn
I will do everything in my power to make sure that this little stunt of yours gets you absolutely nowhere
But I guess I'm really talking to myself here