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Jessie Mueller
Overture

[ENSEMBLE]
Diary, diary, diary, diary
Diary of a wimpy kid!

[GREG]
Wait, wait, wait, wait, stop!
First of all, let me get something straight
This is a journal, not a diary
I know what it says on the cover, but when Mom went out to buy this thing, I specifically told her to get one that didn't say diary on it
If she thinks I'm going to write down my feelings in here or whatever, she's crazy
Don't expect me to be all 'dear diary this,' 'dear diary that'