Gonna tell you a story, that you won't believe
But I fell in love last Friday evening
With a girl I saw on a bar room TV screen
Well I was just getting ready to get my hat
When she caught my eye, and I put it back
And I ordered myself couple of more shots and beers

The night that I fell in love with a roller derby queen
Around and round, a round and round
The meanest hunk of woman that anybody ever seen
Down in the arena

She were 5 foot 6, two-fifteen
A bleach blonde bomber with a streak of mean
She knеw how to knuckle and she knew how to scufflе and fight
And the roller derby program said
That she was built like a 'fridgerator with a head
Her fans called her Tuffy, but all her buddies called her Spike

You know that I fell in love with a roller derby queen
Around and round, a round and round
The meanest hunk of woman that anybody ever seen
Down in the arena

Well I could not help it, but to fall in love
With this heavy duty woman I've been speaking of
Things were kinda bad, until the day she skated into my life
Well she might be nasty, she might be fat
But I never met a person who would tell her that
She's my bleach blonde bomber, my heavy handed Hackensack mama
You know that I fell in love with a roller derby queen
Around and round, a round and round
The meanest hunk of woman that anybody ever seen
Down in the arena