[Produced by Dr. Seuss]

[Intro: Eminem & Royce da 5'9"]
I'm 'bout to, I'm 'bout to scare these kids
I'm 'bout to scare these kids
I'm 'bout to scare these children
Aight, (Yo) my name is (Royce)
My name is, my name is (5'9") Slim Shady, Slim Shady

[Verse 1: Eminem]
Arsonist, blocking a fire hose where the nozzle is
Go to hospitals, steal the blood that tests positive
Take it home, pour it in a cup and drink lots of it
Trying on your mother's clothes, trying to get these bras to fit
When she comes home, I'm waiting in the closet
With a knife, hiding so quiet, she'll probably hear the faucet drip
All my life, I've been a foster kid
So if I die an early death, suicide's gon' be the cause of it

[Verse 2: Royce Da 5'9]
Who hard? Yo, I done heard worse
We can get in two cars and accelerate at each other
To see which one'll swerve first
Two blind bandits panic, whose mental capacity
Holds that of a globe on top of nine other planets
Kissed the cheek of the Devil, intelligence level
Is hellier than treble peakin' on speakers in the ghetto
Dismissal, I'm not a fair man, disgraced the race of an atheist
Interceptin' missiles with my bare hands like a patriot
One track sliced without swords, I buried the Christ corpse
In my past life, when the Black Knight mounted the white horse
Then one get at you, dash you in the back of a Chevrolet
Spittin' shit at you faster than your eardrum could ever play
[Chorus: Eminem & Royce da 5'9"]
'Cause this is what happens when Bad meets Evil
We hit the trees 'til we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Seagal
Above the law 'cause I don't agree with police either
(Shit, me neither)

[Verse 3: Eminem & Royce da 5'9"]
We ain't eager to be legal
So please leave me with the keys to your Jeep Eagle
I breathe ether in three lethal amounts
While I stab myself in the knee with a diseased needle (Ahh! Haha)
Releasin' rage on anybody in squeezin' range
Cold enough to make the seasons change into freezin' rain
(Shit, he's insane!) Nah, I just want to shoot up
And I'm pissed off, 'cause I can't find a decent vein

[Verse 4: Royce da 5'9"]
The disaster with dreads, I'm bad enough to commit suicide
And survive long enough to kill my soul after I'm dead
When in danger, it's funny, actually my flavor's similar to a waiter
'Cause I serve any stranger with money
I fade a hundred, man, until they joint chains
While slippin' bullets at point-blank range like they was punches
I got a lot of ego; I got knowledge peeking out of my cerebral now that I got people locked and rock evil
While still on the beat, I hit you in your ribs so hard your fingers end up touching the floor, while you're still on your feet
I'm blazin' emcees, at the same time amazin' emcees
Somehow, emcees ain't that eyebrow-raisin' to me
Destroying the track, un-employing the whack, exploring the facts while my man Eminem is withdrawing from crack
[Interlude: Eminem]
*crying*
I just love him, I just love him...

[Verse 5: Eminem & Royce da 5'9"]
I used to be a loudmouth, remember me? (Uh-huh)
I'm the one who burned your house down (Oh...)
Well, I'm out now
And this time, I'm comin' back to blow your house up
And I ain't gon' leave you with a window to jump out of
Give me two fat tabs and three shrooms
And you won't see me, like fat people in steam rooms
And when I go to hell and I'm gettin' ready to leave
I'ma put air in a bag and charge people to breathe (Yeah)

[Chorus: Royce da 5'9" & Eminem]
You see this is what happens when Bad meets Evil
And we hit the trees 'til we look like Vietnamese people
He's Evil, and I'm Bad like Steve Seagal
Against peaceful, see you in Hell for the sequel
(We'll be waiting) See you in Hell
Slim Shady, Royce da 5'9", Wall Street
Yeah, see you in Hell for the sequel
Doc Seuss, yeah
Meets Evil, I'm Bad, yeah