Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’97
Wear sunscreen
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
It. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by
Scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
Than my own meandering
Experience…I will dispense this advice now
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
Understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
Recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
You and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you
Imagine
Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
Effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
Bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
Never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
On some idle Tuesday
Do one thing everyday that scares you
Sing
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
People who are reckless with yours
Floss
Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
You’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
Yourself
Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
Succeed in doing this, tell me how
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements
Stretch
Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
Life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they
Wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
Olds I know still don’t
Get plenty of calcium
Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone
Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children,maybe
You won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky
Chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don’t
Congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
Choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body
Use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
Think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
Own..
Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room
Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly
(Brother and sister together we'll make it through
Someday your spirit will take you and guide you there
I know you've been hurting, and I know I've been waiting to be there
For you. And I'll be there to help you out, whenever I can)
Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for
Good
Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
People most likely to stick with you in the future
Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you
Should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
Lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
Knew when you were young
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
In Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft
Travel
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
Philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize
That when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
Noble and children respected their elders
Respect your elders
Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund
Maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
Might run out
Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will
Look 85
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
Supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
Fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
Ugly parts and recycling it for more than
It’s worth
But trust me on the sunscreen…
(Brother and sister together we'll make it through
Someday your spirit will take you and guide you there
I know you've been hurting, and I know I've been waiting to be there
For you. And I'll be there just helping you out, whenever I can
Everybody's free oh yeah
Oh everybody's free oh yeah.)