[Verse 1]
Ask me how do I feel, little me with my quiet upbringing
Well, sir, all I can say is if I were a gate, I'd be swinging
From the moment we kissed tonight
That's the way I've just gotta behave
Boy, if I were a lamp, I'd light
Or if I were a banner, I'd wave

[Verse 2]
Ask me how do I feel now that we're cosy and clingin'
Well, sir, all I can say is if I were a gate, I'd be swingin'
And if I were a watch I'd start popping my springs
And if I were a bell I'd go ding dong ding dong ding

[Instrumental Break]

[Verse 3]
Ask me how do I feel with this chemistry lesson I'm learnin'
Well, sir, all I can say is if I werе a bridge, I'd be burnin'
Yes, I knеw my morale would crack
From the wonderful way that you looked
Boy, if I were a duck, I'd quack
And if I were a goose, I'd be cooked

[Verse 4]
Ask me how do I feel now that we're fondly caressing
Boy, if I were a salad I'd surely be splashing my dressing
And ask me how to describe this whole beautiful thing
And if I were a bell I'd go ding dong ding dong ding
And if I were a bell I'd go ding dong ding dong ding