It was christmas eve and Santa hadn't come
Everyone but me had something in their stocking
I'd been good all year but presents had I none
Just then at the door there came a gentle knocking

It was Mrs Claus with a ribbon round
And Santa sent her when a mistake was found
That left me out of luck when the presents were packed
In fact

There was nothing left for me
That is why he sent Mrs Claus

For it seems in northern climes where Eskimos abound
It's the thing to do to keep a chap from chilling
Sending out the wife's a doctrine they expound
Thusly Mrs Claus was eager to be willing

How could I refuse custom to obey
I hear they take offence if your shy and say
Thank you very much but I'm not in the mood
How rude

It would be, besides, Mrs Claus was a living doll

That was christmas day a year or so ago
Still I dread to hear old Santa's sleigh bells ringing
Every christmas eve I pray it doesn't snow
I know when he comes the present he'll be bringing

What he's got for me won't come in any sack
He'll be dressed to kill and I'll be wearing yellow
Several times he wrote and asked to have her back
Ahh but Mrs Claus prefers a younger fellow

It was christmas eve and Santa hadn't come
Everyone but me had something in their stocking
I'd been good all year but presents had I none