[Verse 1]
Well, he's mainly 'I can do it'
And the rest is 'Yes, I am'
Oh, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones

Oh, he comes on like Rock Hudson
And he thinks he's Superman
But, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones

Took his chopper up to Woodstock
And he wormed his way backstage
Oh, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones

Oh, he says he knows The Beatles
S&G and Jimmy Page
Oh, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones

I can't figure out
What he's all about
Makin' eyes at Sheila
Until he know's she's mine
I can't figure out
What he's all about
But something tells me Sheila thinks he's fine

He's brewin' in the summer
'Cause he's always at the shore
Me and Waldo P. Emerson Jones
Doin' handstands for my baby
I can't stand it anymore
Oh, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones

I can't figure out
What he's all about
Makin' eyes at Sheila
Doesn't he know's she's mine
I can't figure out
What he's all about
But something tells me Sheila thinks he's fine

Well, he's mainly 'I can do it'
And the rest is 'Yes, I am'
Oh, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones

Oh, he comes on like Rock Hudson
And he thinks he's Superman
But, he's Waldo P. Emerson Jones
Waldo P.--- Waldo P. Emerson Jones
Waldo P.--- Waldo P. Emerson Jones
Waldo P.--- Waldo P. Emerson Jones
Waldo P.--- Waldo P. Emerson Jones
(fades)