[Part I: Yell Help]

[Verse 1]
Yell help
Too many cooks and a bird in the bush
Yell help
Yell help
If your mirror busts and your cat gets cussed
Yell help

[Chorus]
'Cause down the road you find someone else who's lookin'
Down the road you find another sweet lady cookin'
So I gotta yell help
Yell help, yell help, yell help

[Verse 2]
Yell help
Some shelter from the storm like the travel agent warned
Yell help
If you can help your superstitions they gonna keep you warm

[Chorus]
'Cause down the road you find someone else who's lookin'
Down the road you find another sweet lady cookin'
So I gotta yell help
Yell help, yell help, yell help, yell help, yell help
[Part II: Wednesday Night]

[Chorus]
I wish tonight wasn't Wednesday night
I wish it wasn't the thirteenth of July (Yell help)
And you're lookin' at the guy whose eyes can't deny
That he wishes he was somewhere else tonight
I wish tonight wasn't Wednesday night
I wish it wasn't the thirteenth of July (Yell help)
And you're lookin' at the guy whose eyes can't deny
That he wishes he was somewhere else tonight

[Part III: Ugly]

[Verse 1]
Well, I met this woman down in New Orleans
Lord, she built just like a dream
Even wore stockings that had seams and she was ugly
Now hell, I don't mind
Women of her kind
I'll even pay sometimes for a woman that's ugly

[Verse 2]
Ooh, she built like a steamroller
Just the kind to mow you over anytime
Hey, the moment might arrive
On Bourbon Street
Well, the ugliest woman you'll ever meet
But she's mine all mine and she's ugly
So I better yell help
[Chorus]
Yell help
Yell help
Yell help
Yell help (She was ugly, she was ugly)
Yell help
Yell help (She was ugly, she was ugly)
I wish tonight wasn't Wednesday night
I wish it wasn't the thirteenth of July
Yell help
Yell help (She was ugly, she was ugly)
I wish tonight wasn't Wednesday night
I wish it wasn't the thirteenth of July
Yell help
Yell help (She was ugly, she was ugly)
I wish tonight wasn't Wednesday night
I wish it wasn't the thirteenth of July
Yell help
Yell help

[Outro]
Ugly
Ugly, so ugly, yeah
Ugly, so ugly, yeah
Ugly, so ugly, yeah
Ugly, so ugly, yeah
Ugly, so ugly, yeah
Ugly, so ugly, yeah
Ugly, so ugly, yeah