Capsize, tired eyes
Collapse into clean sheets, Martinized
By bored friends' mothers who feed to release
Their trust in kids and adult defeats

Home fries ain't no surprise
Been about 17 since I realized
No dashboard's gonna stop this chin
If I take the wheel in the state I'm in

So one cheese steak and a Tastykake
Before I stop by Sears, get them to fix my breaks
All that Mopar, cement, snow, and rebar
And I just don't know how the roads are

No ballgame on a snow day
But you're gonna see something crazy anyway:
Budd Dwyer's .357, the press
And another 10 ways to increase your debt

[Chorus]
Hey, hey, what are you gonna do
When the credit card people start looking for you?
Blame it on the Governor, say, "I'm from PA
Please bill me at a later date
And you can send it to me in Pennsylvania"

Recalls and Armor All
I swear I can see Mumia straight from the Mall
Because the Camp Hill Prison doesn't hide its prize
And down in Philly a whole block's on fire

Guess they're trying to get rid of them all
Turned on the TV, can't believe what I saw:
PBS, Zapatistas, the FARC?
No, it's 6200, Cobbs Creek Park!

[Chorus]
Hey, hey, what are you gonna do
When the credit card people start looking for you?
Blame it on the Governor, say, "I'm from PA
Won't you please bill me at a later date?
You can send it to me in Pennsylvania"