[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
JOHN LENNON
VS
BILL O'REILLY
BEGIN!

[Verse 1: John Lennon]
Help! You're making my ears bleed, you need a muzzle
Why you pissed off all the time? Didn't your mom give you a cuddle?
You're the type of guy who could die of heart attack just in the shower
You need to chill out for a minute, and smoke weed for an hour
Every time I watch your show, all you do is scream at me
And your face looks like a shit I took, high on LSD
I'm John Lennon, I'm a legend, I can see through all your tricks
I wonder how much George Bush paid you to suck his dick

[Verse 2: Bill O'Reilly]
You fucking long hair, living in your Yellow Submarine
Well, you're about to get sunk by the right-wing political machine
Stop your presses, Lennon, you call me Mister Bill O'Reilly
When it comes to squashing limeys, I come recommended highly
You're weak; between you and me, there's no comparison
I'll beat you so bad, you'll weep gently like George Harrison
You're Paul McCartney's bitch, with less talent than Ringo
And I'd rather suck George Bush's dick than Yoko Ono's
[Verse 3: John Lennon]
Well, you can't buy me love, but I'll kick your ass for free
I'll take Maxwell's silver hammer and give you a lobotomy
I'm tired of how you scheme to stir the people up
Why don't you just take a vacation and shut the fuck up?

[Verse 4: Bill O'Reilly]
'Cause I'm evil, heart blacker than Don Cheadle
Ten-thousand dollar shoes I use to stomp out a Beatle
Don't tell me to shut the fuck up, that's how I survive
Now here's Sting—what? Fuck it, we'll do it live!

[Outro]
WHO WON?
WHO'S NEXT?
YOU DECIDE!
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!