[Chorus]
Come on, did you hear me?
I'll give twenty dollars more
To help them little cats and dogs
That have been shut out in the cold

Hey mister (mister) auctioneer
I raise my hand
So if you need those bids believe me
I'm your man

He walks in with an air like he's not in the room
His eyes bright behind thin rimmed glasses
A smile to disarm his potential opponents in the game
With a flick of an ear he can hear any schemes
You may have if your hand would appear
Is it your turn to share his might in the figurative spotlight?
Though you might want to ask him why
He's got bigger things to buy

[Chorus]
Come on, did you hear me?
I'll give twenty dollars more
To help them little cats and dogs
That have been shut out in the cold
Hey mister (mister, mister) auctioneer
I raise my hand
So if you need those bids believe me
I'm your man

Is it personal greed or a need to be the
Last voice heard in a room full of rookies?
(His name is known by all the gophers
Look, he's dropping two hundred on some knitted loafers)

Sometimes he'll wait in the dark off the grid
Until he jumps and doubles the highest bid
(Going once, going twice, three, four, times sold
To the man in the striped lab coat)

We all know this cat's got claws
And, hey, it all goes to a good cause

[Chorus]
Come on, did you hear me?
I'll give twenty dollars more
To help them little cats and dogs
That have been shut out in the cold

Hey mister (mister, mister) auctioneer
I raise my hand
So if you need those bids believe me
I'm your man
And with all of his charity auction prowess
You think that he'd pick up lots of enemies, but no
He's pretty much universally well liked by everyone that's met him
'Cause he never writes IOUs or bounces checks, you can bet
When his hand is in the air
You had best not even dare

[Chorus]
Come on, did you hear me?
I'll give twenty dollars more
To help them little cats and dogs
That have been shut out in the cold

Hey mister (mister, mister) auctioneer
I raise my hand
So if you need those bids believe me
I'm your man

Come on, did you hear me?
I'll give twenty dollars more
To help them little cats and dogs
That have been shut out in the cold

Hey mister (mister, mister) auctioneer
I raise my hand
So if you need those bids believe me
I'm your man