"Stone Cold" Steve Austin
Where’s the Beer?
Jim: Hey Steve, Welcome to the studio. Glad you to be here today
Stone Cold: Yeah, I'm glad to be here. Got everything ready right?
Jim: I got everything ready, just like we spoke on the phone
Stone Cold: Uh, Where..
Jim: Just like you told me
Stone Cold: Where's the beer?
Jim: Um.. *sigh* You didn't mention beer
Stone Cold: I specifically mentioned beer, how you expect me to record a record without no beer?
Jim: Sorry, sorry my mistake I'll get some beer?
Stone Cold: It have happened to anybody ok? Maybe I shouldn't be so hard on you it's kind of early in the morning
Jim: It's 3 o'clock in the afternoon Steve
Stone Cold: What are you saying?
Jim: I, no it's just. Hey, lets listen to the track I think you're going to be happy
Stone Cold: Good, I been looking forward to it. Hard n' Heavy right?
Jim: Hard n' Heavy, but a... you know a kinda going for a sensative side of Steve Austin... and just take a
Listen see what you think
Stone Cold: Sensative side?
Jim: Well just take a listen
Stone Cold: Alright I'll take a listen, but but I told you Hard n' Heavy
Jim: It's really Hard n' Heavy
Stone Cold: Ok, good
*Jim plays a sample of the beat for Stone Colds song*
*Stops the sample*
Jim: What you think? Good aye?
Stone Cold: Good? Your kidding me right?
Jim: No?
Stone Cold: Man I told you Hard n' Heavy I told you Rock n' Roll!
Jim: Well Steve, that was..
Stone Cold: That wasn't Rock n' Roll!
Jim: It's just another look at Stone Cold Steve Austin
Stone Cold: Hmmm??
Jim: Broaden broaden broaden your character you know?
*In a cocky smart ass voice*
Stone Cold: Yes yes yes a different look at Stone Cold Steve Aus.. I'm not looking for a different look at Stone
Cold steve Austin!
Jim: ...
Stone Cold: I told you what I wanted!
Jim: Ok...
Stone Cold: That's not what I wanted, clearly that's not what I wanted!
Jim: Sorry...what would make it more to your liking?
Stone Cold: You want me to show you something?
Jim: Yeah, why don't you...
Stone Cold: Which guitar can I use?
Jim: The 6 string Acoustic Guitar over there laying right next to you on the guitar stand
Stone Cold: Jim, an Acoustic Guitar has no place on this track!
Jim: Well, well you know if you play... it hard, sometimes it amazing the depth you can get playing the Acoustic
Stone Cold: So now your going to tell me Stone Cold Steve Austin how to play the Acoustic Guitar, and if I play
It harder, if I twang the strings harder, that's going to make it sound more Rock n' Roll, more violent!?
Jim: Yeah... Why don't you just pick up the guitar and see what you think
Stone Cold: Ok, let me pick up the Acoustic Guitar and we'll see what happens
*The sound of Stone Cold violently picking up the guitar, setting it down and crushing his boot through the
Guitar.*
Stone Cold: Ha Ha Ha!
(laughing while he speaks)
Did you see, did you see the way my foot ran right through the strings and crashed in right through it all
Jim: Yeeaah, I did... yeah I saw that
Stone Cold: (continues to laugh while he speaks)
I'm sorry but, it's jus so funny!!
(gets serious)
Hey, look at it this way Jim, it was an antique now you can go out and buy you a new one. Why you sit here and
Play this old pile of shit, when you can go buy you a brand new one
Jim: That's a good point
Stone Cold: Charge it to Vince. Ha ha HA!