[Verse 1]
Yeah, lately Iām hurtinā the people who love me the most
Damn, my emotions take over,ā
itāsā
something I canātā
control
I look in the mirror likeā
whereās the me I used to know?
Because right now, I can use him the most
Yeah, I can use him the most
Damn, when did my heart become so bitter and cold? (Cold)
When did I start walking down this lonely road? (Road)
Thereās parts of my life that Iām too afraid to show
Thereās parts about me Iām embarrassed to know
When they stop caring, I started carrying this load
No one understand what my life is like
Iām still looking out for the brightest night
I been fighting so much, doubt when I'd try to write
Iām paralyzed, and I feel stuck inside my mind
You're fearing Iām going crazy, I think I just might
You should probably stay away and take my advice
I been through dark days, I canāt find a light
If you look at me you wouldnāt see a sign of life
I donāt know how I got this way, I just am this way
Judge all you want, but you donāt know my pain
Depression got me feelinā like I canāt be saved
No, I canāt be saved
So what if I said, āfuck itā and picked up a gauge, and pressed the trigger to my head and blast my brains
Acting like you were there for me, now care for me
When Iām gone and Iām in my grave, fuck
[Chorus]
Lately I just wonder if Iāll come around
'Cause I donāt wanna lose me
Iām sorry that I fallen and Iāve let you down
But I donāt wanna lose me
Iāve falling, Iāve falling, I fell again
I fell, I fell, I fell
I fell, I fell, Iām falling again
[Verse 2]
I need therapy to figure out what my problem is
Iām done going online, itās eating away at my confidence
Itās like I search for the hate, and ignore all the compliments
Iām done reading the comments ācause Iām getting tired of it
Yeah, man, Iām getting tired of it
Damn, when Iām being me I feel like Iām being somebody else (Else)
Iām surrounded by people, but feel like thereās nobody else (Else)
Nobody comes to rescue me when Iām calling for help
I swear my mind is a tormented place, I sit and I dwell, hammer in the nail
How the fuck did I garner millions of comments of people telling me Iām great?
But I donāt believe it, but I believe in the ones giving me hate
Itās like I look for validation for an idea in my mind that I already made
When did I tell myself I wasnāt worthy, Iām undeserving
Let critics hurt me, I feel like a fake
I swear my mind is a trap and my heart is the prey
Someone take my social media away
Iām on it for days, I read and I rage
Thereās nothing to say, Iām losing my way
Iām losing my strength, Iām losing my faith
My insecurities that keep me awake
Iām stuck in this paradigm that I know that Iām dying to escape, damn
[Chorus]
Lately I just wonder if Iāll come around
'Cause I donāt wanna lose me
Iām sorry that I fallen and Iāve let you down
But I donāt wanna lose me
Iāve falling, Iāve falling, I fell again
I fell, I fell, I fell
I fell, I fell, Iām falling again
[Verse 3]
Yeah, Iām at war with myself, Iām battling me everyday
And I never win, this is a battle of strength
I overthink till Iām numb, I think I need a break
Because right know, Iām losing my way
Yeah, Iām losing my way
Yeah, Iām causing my misery, and maybe Iām the one to blame (Blame)
If I feel sorry, that means I donāt gotta change (Change)
Iām dealing with demons that I was unwilling to face
I was looking for fame to try to cover the fact
That Iām an act, I canāt out run from my mistakes
Iām running from myself, but obviously running away from me is so worthless
I had to pry open my soul, and I had to look way deeper under the surface
I should of been me, but instead of being me I was too busy trying to be perfect
Now they want me to be perfect
Faking itās become a burden
Iām losing my patience, going through phases
I fucking hate myself
Why I am chasing, using my fame when, I can't escape myself?
Iām feeling anxious, who do I blame when, I canāt blame myself?
Fans said I save them, how can I save them?
I canāt save myself, fuck
[Chorus]
Lately I just wonder if Iāll come around
'Cause I donāt wanna lose me
Iām sorry that I fallen and Iāve let you down
But I donāt wanna lose me
Iāve falling, Iāve falling, I fell again
I fell, I fell, I fell
I fell, I fell, Iām falling again