[HEATHER DUKE, spoken]
I hear last night, Martha Dumptruck did a cannonball off the Mill Creek Bridge holding a suicide note

[VERONICA, spoken]
Oh my God. Is she alive?

[HEATHER DUKE, spoken]
Just some broken bones. Yet another geek trying to imitate the popular people and failing, big time

[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM AND KURT]
Yo -
Girl -
Keep it together
I -
Knew -
You would go far
Now -
You’re -
Truly a Heather
Smell -
How -
Gangsta you are

[VERONICA, spoken]
Martha, I’m so sorry!
[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM AND KURT]
Yo -
Girl -
Feel a bit punchy?
What’s -
That -
Brimstoney smell?
Now -
You’ve -
Earned that red scrunchie
Come-
Join -
Heather in hell!

[VERONICA’S DAD, spoken]
Where have you been?

[VERONICA’S MOM, spoken]
We’ve been worried sick! Your friend J.D. stopped by. He told us everything?

[VERONICA, spoken]
...‘Everything’?

[VERONICA’S DAD, spoken]
Your depression? Your thoughts of suicide?
[VERONICA’S MOM, spoken]
He even showed us your copy of Moby Dick!

[VERONICA, spoken]
This is not my handwriting!

[VERONICA’S MOM, spoken]
I’ve been on the phone all morning. There’s a doctor in Cleveland, we’d like you to talk with him

[VERONICA, spoken]
What kind of doctor?

[VERONICA’S DAD, spoken]
Psychiatric

[VERONICA’S MOM, spoken]
Leonard!

[VERONICA’S DAD, spoken]
What?

[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM & KURT]
Guess who’s right down the block

[VERONICA, spoken]
You’re sending me to a shrink?!
[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM AND KURT]
Guess who’s climbing the stairs

[VERONICA’S MOM, spoken]
There’s no shame in getting some help

[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM AND KURT]
Guess who’s picking your lock

[VERONICA, spoken]
I am not the problem!

[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM AND KURT]
Time’s up! Go say your prayers!

[VERONICA’S DAD, spoken]
She took that well

[HEATHER CHANDLER, RAM AND KURT]
Veronica’s running on, running on fumes now
Veronica’s totally fried
Veronica’s gotta be tripping on ‘shrooms now
Thinking that she can hide
Veronica’s done for, there’s no doubt now
Notify next of kin!
Veronica’s trying to keep him out now
TOO LATE!
He got in!

[J.D., spoken]
Knock! Knock! Sorry to come in through the window
Dreadful etiquette, I know!

[VERONICA, spoken]
Get out of my house!