[Verse 1]
Your daddy works in porno, now that mommy's not around
She used to love her heroine, but now she's underground
So, you stay out late at night, and you do your coke for free
Drivin' your friends crazy with your life's insanity

[Chorus]
Well, well, well, you just can't tell
Well, well, well, my Michelle
Look out!

[Verse 2]
Sowin' all your wild oats in another's luxuries
Yesterday was Tuesday, maybe Thursday you can sleep
But school starts much too early, and this hotel wasn't free
So what to your connection calls, I'll return the keys

[Chorus]
Well, well, well, you just can't tell
Well, well, well, my Michelle
Little bitch!
Well, well, well, you just can't tell
Well, well, well, my Michelle
Go, go-go-go!

[Verse 3]
Ooh, everyone needs love, you know that it's true
Someday, you'll find someone that'll fall in love with you
But, oh, the time it takes when you're all alone
Someday, you'll find someone that you can call your own
But, 'til then, you better!
[Guitar Solo]

[Verse 4]
Now you're clean and so discreet, I won't say a word
But most of all this song is true, case you haven't heard
So, c'mon and stop your cryin', we both know money burns
Honey, don't stop tryin' an' you'll get what you deserve

[Chorus]
Well, well, well, you just can't tell
Well, well, well, my Michelle
Well, well, well, you never can tell
Well, well, well, my Michelle (in gr–)

[Outro]
My, my, my Michelle, my, my, my Michelle
Muh-muh-muh-muh-muh-muh, my Michelle
Muh-ma-ma ma-ma-ma ma, my-my Michelle
Michelle!