I am your neighbor. I seem most respectable
But underneath I'm an iniquitous toad
Down at the end of your road
And I live down the end of your road

From your striped lawn and your new swimming pool
Sabotage your gardening tools
And I live down the end of your road

By day I am a real estate gentleman
After dark, I plan my most devious practices
Which you might think are not very nice

Welling up, as you sit on your private throne
Will come up all kinds of vile and despicable nasties
You would rather not have in your home
And I live down the end of your road

Dispensed loathsome creatures in your drawing room
Sent doggy poo-poos in your morning mail
Rat's heads and lark's wings should set your tums turning
And your houses will soon be for sale
And I live down the end of your road

I live down the end of your road