So you're on the floor, at 54
Think you can last at Le Palace?
Does your body go to the to and fro?
Tonight's the night or didn't you know

That Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe

He tried his tricks that Ruskie bear
The United Nations said "It's all fair"
He did the radiation, he did the chemical plague
He could not win with a Cossack spin
The Vostok Bomb, the Stalin strike
He tried every move, he tried to hitchhike
He drilled a hole like a Russian star
He made every move in his repertoire

When Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe

Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe
It's G.I. Joe's turn to blow
He turned it on cool and slow
He tried a pay phone call to the Pentagon
A radar scan, a leviathan
He wiped the Earth clean as a plate
What does it take to make a Ruskie break?
But the crowd are bored and off they go
Over the road to watch China blow!

Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe (Ivan meets G.I. Joe)
Ivan meets G.I. Joe