Dear Dad, I used to want to be just like you
And I told myself I'd always try to
But at some point, I gave up
I was only a kid when I used to see you laid up
Multiple Sclerosis had you weighed up
But even though it ravaged your body, it never took your heart
But there were times as a kid that I could tell it shook you hard And to be honest it shook us, too
I remember whispering to Don at night like what should we do? We could hear you moaning in the other room
He'd just tell me not to worry, that's what big brothers do
Doctors gave you five years, you always managed to pull through
I used to wanna be just like you
But that's before I realized I'm nothing like you
The smallest battles are hard for me to fight through
You're a warrior, I'm an amateur, I'm nothing like you
You carried the weight of depression and disease
But you never let it take you to your knees
I used to look at God for help, and I'd beg and I'd plead
I'd ask Him to heal you, please God, please
But the MS just wouldn't leave
And every day I go without pain, I remember you don't
And when I think about living to be an old man, I'm reminded you won't
And I don't know how much time I have left with you
And sometimes, it's hard for me to message you
I mean honestly, I just want to hug you
But I'm out here trying to make you proud of me, Dad I love you
I hope you can see that you did this to me
Every sermon I preach and person I lead
You're responsible for the best in me
But I know too well that the best of me isn't all that's left in me
I carry a lot of pain, not physically like you, but emotional and blue
It's like I can't stop thinking I should have had that disease and not you
But then again, it would have crippled me, it doesn't stop you
But why is it my Dad has to battle this demon of death?
I promise if this disease was visible, I'd cut off its head
I hate Multiple Sclerosis
But I understand life isn't sunshine and roses
If I could push back the waters you're drowning in, I'd split the ocean like Moses
And you'd land on dry ground, and you'd be pain-free
I want you to know that it's your example that saved me
And everything good in me you gave me
I could've had a billion dads, but it was you who raised me
And I hope to be at least half the man you are
Because I know being just like you would be too hard