Forensic fanatic, I hide away in the attic
Lookin' through this stack of boxes, pics that are toxic
Xanax or Suboxone
I've never been a fan of poppins
Unless it's Mary
Oh, quite contrary
Lost a tooth, but never met a fairy
I prefer goodbyes, hayrides past coffins
Sick twisted toxins, I'm boxed in
Forgetting who the boss is
If it's you, then I'm sorry
You protect me, but you are me
Or at least you're inside of me
You're somebody some would give an eye to be
You were my saving grace when the Devil lied to me
Bribery at the library, old books and the lies they carried
And they don't carry weight
Holy Spirit catch me when I faint
I've never been a saint
But I've never been a fake
Stop playing games with my thoughts for God's sake
God's Son on my neck, don't make me get it tatted on my face
I'm never flattered when I'm praised
That's just not how I was raised
I came up different
The room gets quiet when my name gets mentioned
He's the best or he's the worst
He's a blessing or he's a curse
He's a little or he's a little crazy
I'm glad you finally agree, or, maybe
Social media made me, social media praised me
Social media pay me
Your kids are like social media raised me
Which means I raised some of them
I was their escape when classmates made fun of them
And that's why they listen like they do
They'd rather listen to me than hear it from you
Because I don't judge them or make them choose
And they don't judge me when I let loose
So whatever's inside of me gets inside of you
You never lied to me, and I never lied to you
Devil hit the switch off, but I light up the room
So burn, Devil, burn
And if that's an oxymoron then squirm, Devil, squirm
And if it's not, then burn, Devil, burn
You ruined my life, but this time it's my turn, it's my turn
So squirm, squirm, you sick little worm
Next day, I'm right back at it
Opening boxes I put away in the attic
How can I be born again but make porn my friend?
And I don't like watching it on a screen
Pornography was never for me
But girls were, and I was with a lot of them
And my friends used to brag about the girls they'd been with
I always kept it private, my business wasn't for them
But I got isolated in sex and a whole lot of it
Ten girls in one autumn
My address might as well have been Sodom
Isolation is where the Devil takes you to die
But God yanked me out of that pit, and I still don't know why
To go back, sometimes, I have the urge
Especially when I see how fake people are at church
I get along with the people at the bar more than the people in the pews
The people at the bar listen, the people in the pews force me to choose
Believe like us, or we kick you out
If you're different, they'll try to get you out
Harbor Shores Church tried to kick me out
But I was already gone with the rest
Like a jealous girlfriend who says she broke up with you but you'd already left
Pastors can be cockroaches, elders can be pests
Pastors can be anointed, elders can be blessed
It all depends on where you go, I guess
And right now, I don't know if I'm cursed
Or if I'm blessed