The hard part, probably, is admitting that I really can't handle it anymore
I can't just hire someone to take care of the two year old unpaid parking ticket
I threw money at my loneliness and all I got were friends who think of drunk driving as a sport
I stared at my phone for so long that I grew a glass face
First: you say you feel nothing
Then, your eyes start to agree with you
Then one day, someone you love, probably, cries in front of you
And your only thought is 'when is dinner?'

There's only one way left to talk about being sad
That won't make me more sad
I'm so sad, I jumped off a bridge and missed
I'm so sad, one time I called my therapist "Mom"
I've made enough jokes about killing myself
That I'm starting to think they're funny

Every time I say 'goodbye', I find myself adding 'forever'
Because who knows when it will be true?
The text message is a light-bulb on a bad wire
I start typing and the ellipses flicker
If I say delete
If I delete
The filament pops and the whole light sleeps

Tomorrow is a lease I have to sign every morning
Get me a carrier pigeon
Fire up the old telegraph
Open the window and let me shout for help
Something is burning
Bring water
Bring water
I'm so sad I fell in love with hands in a row of teeth
I'm so sad I lined up the knives and stared at them until one of them speaks
Where's the bad part?
How do I carve it out?
By now is it all
Rot?