[Verse 1]
I wash my truck on Saturdays 'cause Saturdays the day you wash your truck
And I don't like automated operated coin machines where I'll get stuck
So I wash it in the driveway 'cause that my way to save a nickel and a dime
That is when I noticed Mr. Johnson steppin' out to sneak a peek at my backside
Now Kitty Johnson bless her heart she tries her hardest just to be the perfect wife
Cooks breakfast lunch and dinner but it ain't enough to keep him satisfied
Now I've never said a word to that poor woman, but I can see it in her eyеs
If looks could kill then Kitty's got me hanging like an apron on a linе

[Chorus]
But it ain't me
It ain't me
You got it right there's something wrong but it ain't me
No, it ain't me
It ain't me
I'm just working on my tan
I ain't worried 'bout your man
I understand but damn it ain't me

[Verse 2]
She always talkin' bout' me at her lady's bible study at the church
She puts me on the prayer list with the terrorists, and the drag queens, and the pervs
Next time she comes a’knocking at my door to tell me I'm not ladylike
I'll tell her she can kiss my ass or she can keep her creepy husband stuck inside
[Chorus]
Cause it ain't me
It ain't me
You got it right there's something wrong but it ain't me
No, it ain't me
It ain't me
I'm just working on my tan
I ain't worried 'bout your man
I understand but damn it ain't me

Yeah I'm just working on my tan
I ain't worried 'bout your man
I get it man but damn it ain't me
It ain't me
It ain't me