[POLLY]
This is awful
I'm his lawful
Ever-loving faithful wife
Joined in wedlock
With a headlock
On his fickle heart for life

[LUCY]
Silky harpy
Wicked sharpy
I detect your little plan
First you needle
Then you wheedle
Hoping you can trap a man

(spoken)
Debutante!

[POLLY, spoken]
Home wrecker!

[LUCY]
You're a silly
Giddy, frilly
Artificial little sham!
First you simper
Then you whimper
Lady, would you kindly scram?
[POLLY]
Aren't you brassy
Acting sassy?
I've done nothing wrong to you
I'm his Mrs
And his kisses
Never can belong to you!

[LUCY, spoken]
Mac!

[POLLY, spoken]
Mac!

[MACHEATH]
How happy I could be with either
If one of them would just go away
But while they both bug me together
To neither a word will I say

But gobbledegook, my sugar
And razzamatazz, my sweet
And tickety boo, my honey baby
With a scatty watty wah on the beat

[POLLY]
Mac promised me
A paradise to be
He promised me a cottage forever bright and fair
There in his love
I'd nestle like a dove
He promised me the moon for a jewel in my hair
[MACHEATH]
My promises I'm not evading
But ladies, be reasonable, I beg
For that phony moon is fading
And that dove has laid an egg

[POLLY, spoken]
My dove?

[LUCY, spoken]
My dove

[POLLY, spoken]
Tell her, Mac!

[MACHEATH]
So gobbledegook, my sugar
And razzamatazz, my sweet
And tickety boo, my honey baby
With a scatty watty wah on the beat, I repeat
With a scatty watty wah on the beat