[Verse 1]
Now, I know a man, he's a hard workin' man
He gets up real early, and he goes down town
And about fifteen minutes after he's been gone
There's a big milk truck, pulls up on the lawn
That milkman rushes up to the door
Where that man's wife is waitin' in a kimono
And she plants a big ol' kiss on his cheek and they go inside...
And that truck never moves for an hour or two
Well, it's none of my business
One day I called him aside and told him what was goin' on
While he was gone
And he said, "Well I guess that's so, but do you know
We're never outta milk or cottage cheese or yogurt
Ice cream, or none of them other cowy things"

[Chorus]
I guess he's makin' the best of a bad situation
Don't wanna make waves, can't you see?
He's just makin' the best of a bad situation
Reckon I'd do the same if it was me

[Verse 2]
Now, I know a man, he's an educated man
He's an alligator wrestler
He jumps right in there and grabs them long green boogers
By whatever you grab them long green boogers by
Well, one day he's got a full Nelson on this big alligator
When this other alligator just sneaks up
And bites his right ear plumb off...
Didn't bat an eye, just crawled off in the shade
And went to sleep — the alligator, not the man
Well, it's none of my business
One day I said, "Well, it's sure too bad
About that little accident that you had
'Cause now your hat's gonna fall down over your eyes
And you can't ever be a gypsy
You don't have no place to wear a gold earring"
He just looked me right straight in the eye and said, "Huh?"
[Chorus]
I guess he's makin' the best of a bad situation
Don't wanna make waves, can't you see?
He's just makin' the best of a bad situation
Reckon I'd do the same if it was me

[Verse 3]
Now, I know a lady, she's a mighty fine lady
Got a heart of gold, she wouldn't harm a fly
She's just tryin' to get by and keep her house in order
But you know that her husband, he worked so hard
He come unglued, he come unwrapped
He just snapped, he thinks he's a chicken...
That's right, one of them cackling Colonel Sanders' types
He roosts in the bush by the side of the house
Well, it's none of my business, but one day I said
"Have you ever thought about findin' him a doctor that could make him well?"
And she said "Well, I have now and then, but then again
He don't eat much, just chickenfeed and all that peckin' in the ground don't hurt nothin'...
Heaven knows, we can use the eggs"

[Chorus]
I guess she's makin' the best of a bad situation
Don't wanna make waves, can't you see?
She's just makin' the best of a bad situation
Reckon I'd do the same if it was me
[Outro]
We're all just makin' the best of a bad situation
We're all in this together, you and me