I make a date for gown
You can bet your life it rains
Tried to give a party
But the guy upstairs complains
Guess I'll go through life
Catching colds and missing trains
Everything happens to me

I never miss a thing
I've had the measles and the mumps
And every time I play an ace
My partner always trumps
Guess I'm just a fool
Who never looks before he jumps
Everything happens to me

At first I thought that you would end this jinx for me
And love would turn the trick to end despair
Now I just can't fool this head that thinks for me
I've mortgaged all my castles in the air
Well I've telegraphed and phoned
Sent an air mail special too
Your answer was goodbye
There was even postage due
Fell in love just once
And it had to be with you
Everything happens to me